First of all we have to say that this is a lovely site. We really love this concept. But lately we have started to wonder a bit if many here are mostly here for showing of their pictures.
It came to our attention that we have some people that only wants to be on Most liked Photoes. They click on like on your pictures and hope to get likes back (maybe). Its always fun to see that someone fancy a picture you have and showing interest for you.
But what we are really curious about is that people can like a picture for some time, and then later unlike it when it shows up on most liked photoes . We didnt think much about it first, but we suddenly wondered why it was fever likes one one of our pictures because some profiles had deleted themselves. We got a bit concerned since we have recrutited a lot of norwegians here, and some of them had also clicked like, so we started to check history of our notification log.
We then checked on the picture we had most likes on, and compared to those in notification log that had liked the picure before but was not on like list on picture now. We then started to look at those profiles and what was in common for those profiles that clicks unlike on a picture is that those profiles has many friends, many pictures and zero validations. It is ok that some is here just to show their pictures etc, maybe that is their fetisj. We dont care about being on a most liked photo list, but we find it very stupid that some "manipulates" and abuses the system. I doubt this was the intention spicymatch had. It was just a "finesse" to an already great site
I hope this site wont turn into a site that is only for peeking on pictures only. And that is a race just to be on top of Most liked Photoes. We are here based on getting to know new and old friends, not to just peek at other pictures to satisfy ourselves.
Our friends and heroes!!! We liked this site at first, but having been here for a short while, it all stands forth as more and more shallow where members act like 14 year old pink bloggers trying to collect "likes". Incredible... We guess it all boils down to the users. But it's kind of like all the other swinger-sites. You have to plow through a lot of weeds to eventually find some flowers... Keep on plowing!
We are keeping on plowing, and we are so lucky that that we already know so many wonderful "flowers" but its good to see that its not just us that thinks of this. But we are not giving up this site, this site got so much good in it, the only thing i dont like is that people focus on getting XXX numbers of friends just to get X likes on pictures.
You are all so right..... as what happens with most other sites, we always end up with a complete mix of people on swinger sites..... photo collectors, friend collectors, voyeurs & show-offs...... (not to mention the fakes)
Luckily, the security features on this site, and all the available customisation tools allow us some peace of mind on what we share and who we share it with. In our opinion, this site is a great way to keep friends connected...... sharing our hot party photos from last weekend was always risky on Facebook.... at least now we can create a list of friends who were at the party, create an album for them, and share the photos between us securely. We're not interested in showing off all our photos to thousands of people who will never have a bearing in our swinger lifestyle. We’re not even interested in showing our pics to people we’re not interested in meeting.
The Photo Like feature is new to us in the swinger lifestyle. First seen on this site. We do think it’s a great way of saying “hey guys, we like your pic” but as you all pointed out, bringing voyeurs, friends collectors and show-offs to the site, changes the ball game. We had to read Nordnorskpar’s blog a couple of times because we simply couldn’t believe people can stoop so low. I guess the problem arises with the “Most Liked Photos” feature. Maybe having the traditional “Photo Competitions” once in a while makes more sense and weeds out the timewasters who are only interested in showing off their hot pics (if they are really theirs in the first place !!!)
Gameon, the most liked photos is great, very good idea actually, its just that someone abuses it. It is just that some found a way to tweak the system. Those that do this earns little respect from us atleast. I just hope the "Timewasters" here dont turn this great swingers site into a picture site, because i doubt that was the intention for this site.
But its very good to get feedback on this, in the long run i do hope that this site doesnt turn into one of those sites where 80% of the profiles are fake or just show off.
Perhaps I did not understand much of this, but this web site is worldwide. Some may be more Hard Swingers than others. They like to show off and respect for it. This web page may be slightly different from what you are used to seeing and reading.
There are probably many fake profiles here, but some are real. We are not concerned with how many likes we get or have but are rather more concerned with those who are behind the profile. That's what's important if you go ahead with whoever is behind the profile.
There are many nice people behind many profiles, we also talked to someone on skype and msn. And it has been fun to tie friendships on the other side of the Norwegian Sea.
As a friend of us said, she was shocked by all the messages she receives. If she was going to spend time on all the messages she would spent 1-2 hours every day to respond to all messages.
Nordnorskpar we agree that the Most Like Photo feature is a good idea, however what we are trying to say is that it might be lead to more profiles being created here by people who are only interested in showing off their photos....... that would be a real shame because we love the idea behind this site.... a social network for real swingers.
Coming back to nordnorskpar's blog, We don't pay attention to how many votes our photos get.... but today we have noticed a BIG reduction of votes in most of our photos. If a photo has 25 votes and then it goes to 24, no one would notice. But when you have 50 votes and then it goes down to 44, you notice. The question is how 5 or 6 people decite at the SAME time to withdraw their votes? Or is it one person having several proviles? Possible?
Well its quite easy. Take a look at your history on who liked your picture. You will then notice that those that likes your picture got pictures higly rated themselves. They vote for your pic, and hope for your vote later. Then they delete their vote at a later stage.
We tried several sites before being 'led' here and I can safely say that we would not be the loveably cantankerous deviants we are today had we not found it! The comparison is night and day. Other sites seem purely to be a means to an end - a way for people to register their presence in the community - but they have serious limitations, don't allow their users to fully illustrate the kind of characters they are, and they seem a little sad and even depraved (and not in the good way).
We think of spicymatch as 'Facebook for (sexy) grown-ups'. The layout seems familiar, so it's easy to use and express yourself, and it appears to host a better class of couple (so far)!
But, as unfortunate as it has become, the integration of Facebook and Twitter into our everyday lives has taught us the necessity of repeatedly changing our profile pics, posting photos and videos to our wall, and generally changing our status on a regular basis just to appear more interesting than we may actually be, and to get folk's attention and start conversations - not necessarily for the likes and the kudos! This inherent behaviour inevitably imprints onto all our online social interactions and many users may not even know why they do what they do.
I suppose that in itself (the sharing and interacting) is not a bad thing: the problem arises with the resulting politics - in particular liking/unliking and friending/unfriending. But as FOUR said,"we are the voters" so we have to take the blame for the culture.
Long (rambling) story short, we think it's in an individual's nature whether they feel the need to seek out approval and there isn't much you can do to change that and, since it takes all sorts of people to build a community, we'll just need to learn to tolerate - or circumvent - the potential collectors, exhibitionists, fakes, frauds, ne'er do-wells, and miscreants that we may share a lifestyle with
As they say: "it takes different strokes to move the world!" . . . "What you taking about Willis?"
[Professor Van-Hellbound will be ranting more nonsense at a seminar near you . . . Watch this space]
Grown-ups?.... we're still teenagers... at heart
You've made many valid points - and we'll add another one..... this site needs a "Hide" option to be able to hide certain posts without having to unfriend people not to offend them. Webmaster please note
Also, the ability to unsubscribe from a friends newsfeed without having to unfriend (again like FB), as well as being able to hide individual posts?
And I want to be a grown-up! It's not fair - I never get to do what I want!